Crime of Passion Love No Passion
by treblegirl1
Summary: Shawn and Gus are out to find and solve the murder of two generals...One-Shot Humor, banter, crime-solving


**Disclaimer: I don't own Psych. That would be USA ...I think. I don't know...**

Gus and Shawn are in the car and Shawn is playing with the radio.

Gus: Shawn stop tinkering with the radio.

Shawn: Gus I'm a guy I don't tinker with anything.

He turned it onto a low rock station.

Gus: So did you see the new temp for the SBPD. She's a fox.

Shawn: Who says She's a fox anymore. I swear it's like you were born in the 1800's.

Gus: Shawn that phrase didn't become popular until the 1950's.

Shawn: My point exactly.

Gus: What point? That didn't make any sense.

Shawn: Just like people looking at me funny when I buy a happy meal. I mean come it's a happy meal its supposed to make you happy.

Gus: Shawn the calorie content and the nutrition are very subpar for a grown man to eat. There's no way you can get full off of that.

Shawn: I know I just like the toy that comes with it

Gus shakes his head and looks at Shawn dissaprovingly.

Gus: Anyways what do you know about the new temp?

Shawn: Oh Gus don't worry about her she's trouble.

Gus: How?

Shawn: She paints her nails with a close precision, starts to notice empty bottles of gin, I took a moment to assess the sins she's paid for.

Gus: Shawn are you reciting lyrics again?

Shawn: No my bobbleheaded friend.

Gus: I told you my head doesn't bobble.

Shawn: No it doesn't it sort of wobbles kind of like an newborn who can't control their head movements.

Gus: Whatever, Shawn.

Shawn: I think her name is Money, no Mona, no Liza, minelli, no lisa MONA LISA! dude her name is Mona Lisa!

Gus: No it's not. I already talked to her her name is Monae. How did you know it was that close though.

Shawn: Easy Gus...I'm psychic.

Gus: Shawn you are not psychic. Delusional, irresponsible, immature, yes. Psychic no.

Shawn: Dude why you gotta ruin all my fun. You're like that clown that was drunk at Amber Miller's birthday party who kept telling us to shut the hell up when we played in the bounce ball thingy when we were 8.

Gus: Whatever Shawn it's time to put our work faces on now.

Shawn: Gus. Putting our any kind of face on is very womanish.

Gus: Shawn the correct word is feminine and to put your face on is in this case to get serious.

Gus gets out the car, and walks ahead and into the station, Shawn lags behind looking at everything behind he recognizes a nice-looking burgundy convertible

Shawn: Hey Gus!Wait up!

He walks in and he sees Juliet taliking to Lassiter at his 'desk' and Gus standing off to the side almost like he was hiding. He walks over to him.

Shawn: What are you doing?

Gus: Lassiter isn't in a good mood.

Shawn: Oh. really?

He walks over to him and says a loud "Hurrah"

Lassiter shakes his head at the sight of him and Juliet smiles

Shawn: Hi Jules. Hey Lassietown.

Jules: Hey Shawn. Have you found anything else about the general's murder?

Shawn: Yes. I solved it.

Jules arches an eyebrow and lassiter rolls his eys and gus is still cowering in the corner.

Lassiter: What do you have?

Shawn: I'm sensing animosity from a certain police detective with a dog's name.

Lassiter: Spencer I don't have the patience for your usual antics today.

Shawn: You never do kind sir. (says with a British accent)

Lassiter: Well I need you to-

Shawn: Sir yes Sir!

Lassiter: Spencer I want you to-

Shawn: Sir yes Sir!

Lassiter: What are you doing?

Shawn starts having his "psychic episodes" and starts flailing around the room.

Shawn(still flailing): No dad! I'm sorry I'll be in the army like you General. I'll stop taking ballet lessons. Did you pay the girl that I love off and send her away. I don't want to be like you.

Lassiter: Not this again.

Gus walks over.

Gus: Shawn can you explain the case like a normal person.

Shawn: I ain't normal and I won't be as long as I live, Gus. ( he says this with a feminine southern accent)

Gus: Shawn.

Shawn: I mean dad's selling the farm so-

Gus: Shawn.

Shawn: He obviously don't want us to date because he has this thing against my father and vice versa so me and charles made up a plan to kill our fathers.

Jules: So you're saying that the two Generals were enemies and didn't want their children to date and their children Charles and Samantha who were lovers, killed their own fathers? Sounds a little far fetched.

Shawn: It's a crime of passion. In this case passion for each other. Look at the facts. Neither of them have a solid alibi on the night of the murders. The Generals were killed in their home so obviously it was an inside job. They both showed a lot of animosity for each other. Also their dads left them a pretty hefty sum that they could live by if they say...ran away together.

Gus: That all sounds pretty circumstantial, Shawn.

Shawn: Yes but is the hair that Samantha was shedding, because of thyroid issues, which was overlooked at both crime scenes circumstantial? Or what about the cigarette that Charles left at his father's murder scene?

All is quiet for a second. Then everyone starts moving.

... 4 Hours later...

Juliet and Lassiter are bringing in Charles and Samantha to arrest them. They look at him with cold sneers on their faces while they're being hauled to a temporary holding cell.

Gus: Good work, Shawn.

Shawn: You don't got to tell me twice.

Gus: What? Anyways how did you know Samantha was balding.

Shawn: (grabs a coffee and donut off of a table) I broke into her house and looked at her medical bills.

Gus: You suspect someone of murder so you break into their house?

Shawn: Gus I took the neccessary precautions. I brought a bat, a lightsaber, a blindfold , and a keychain from Tihuana.

Gus: You're crazy, man.

Shawn: No Gus I just grab life by the horns. Why so grumpy, lumpy? Why don't I take you out and get you a happy meal to cheer you up?

Gus: I don't want a happy meal.

Shawn: Then I'll give you this. (pulls a Gus bobblehead out his backpocket and it has psych written all over it) I bought it for the office.

Gus: (looks at shawn and doesn't say anything but walks away defiantly and purposefully)

Shawn: Oh come on Gus the silent treatment, really? Come say hello to your mini me. Did you even hear that I did Scarface and Austin powers in the same sentence?

**Well this is my first time writing Psych so tell me how it was...Please review **


End file.
